Thursday, February 5, 2009

The Secret of Keeping the Love

A happiness that is sought for ourselves alone can never be found: for a happiness that is diminished by being shared is not big enough to make us happy. There is a false and momentary happiness in self-satisfaction, but it always leads to sorrow because it narrows and deadens our spirit.

True happiness is found in unselfish love, a love which increases in proportion as it is shared. There is no end to the sharing of love, and, therefore, the potential happiness of such love is without limit. Infinite sharing is the law of God's inner life. He has made the sharing of ourselves the law of our own being, so that it is in loving others that we best love ourselves. In disinterested activity we best fulfill our own capacities to act and to be.

Yet there can never be happiness in compulsion. It is not enough for love to be shared: it must be shared freely. That is to say it must be given, not merely taken. Unselfish love that is poured out upon a selfish object does not bring perfect happiness: not because love requires a return or a reward for loving, but because it rests in the happiness of the beloved.

And if the one loved receives love selfishly, the lover is not satisfied. He sees that his love has failed to make the beloved happy. It has not awakened his capacity for unselfish love. Hence the paradox that unselfish love cannot rest perfectly except in a love that is perfectly reciprocated: because it knows that the only true peace is found in selfless love. Selfless love consents to be loved selflessly for the sake of the beloved. In so doing, it perfects itself.

The gift of love is the gift of the power and the capacity to love, and, therefore, to give love with full effect is also to receive it. So, love can only be kept by being given away, and it can only be given perfectly when it is also received.
-Thomas Merton "No Man Is an Island"

9 Grateful Heart's Words:

GAGAY said...

ate shawie..i like your post here! i've learned a lot! much much thanks and hugs for the post!

take care!


qiwoman said...

This was so beautifully said, made me cry today.

es said...

..and love is only love when you give it away without expecting something in return.

very nice reflection sha!keep going!:)

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

What inspiring words from No Man Is An Island. Indeed the best love is the selfless love that loves without limit. Thanks for the inspiring post. God bless you always.

headed to nowhere said...

nice post.. as there is no true love(i believed),it is good to have someone to love us unconditionally.

Spicybugz said...

Thank you for sharing those words with us. It was a good reminder.

Darren Tan said...

Love is beautiful, and you said it beautifully. :-)

Shinade said...

So true, so true Shawie. I thank God daily that he did bless us in our union with total dedication and unselfish love.

I am the happiest if I am making him happy and he feels the same way.

We are also blessed that our children have this within their marriages and also between us.

What a lovely post. Thanks for sharing it with us!

Shawie said...

thanks guys for dropping by and for sharing your thoughts:)
@ Shinade: wow! you've accomplished a lot... I didn't know you're kids are already married...that's really a great pride to see them find their happiness:)